"What prize in Hell am I going to win?," the alpha male husband asked when I told him about the trophy wife resolution. After almost a decade of marriage, a nod from behind The Economist signals his support.
I started with the benefits. He'll get a hotter wife for starters. I'll get in better shape, and thus, increase my health and life span. Who wouldn't want that?
He nodded.
Then, I outlined the strategy. Here's where the nod transformed into a sigh.
Knowing what we have to deal with, it's going to take a lot of work. I'll need hair-straightening/one of those Keratin treatments, at least. Better clothes, teeth whitening, investing in real make-up for the first time in my life, waxing, and classes at the health fitness center where I work. (No one ever mistakes the "nurse" for a fitness instructor.) I may need some laser or other cosmetic treatments too. I'll continue to do more charity and pro bono work, with more visibility at events. An etiquette class was recommended by my best friend. Maybe I could finally cultivate a talent beyond cleaning my kids' noses and ears.
I did forget to tell him that Demi Moore spends about $141,000 a year to look the way she does.
"I need to send two kids to college," he replied.
The good news is I don't have plans for plastic surgery. This Jennifer plans to keep her Jennifer Grey nose.
"What prize in Hell am I going to win?," he asks.
We'll just have to wait and see!
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About Me
- TrophyWifeResolution
- Despite many failed attempts to exercise more, eat better, and take better care of myself, I've decided to make the "Trophy Wife Resolution." Since I am the complete anti-thesis of a trophy wife, let's see if I can rise to the challenge!
I can totally see the alpha male saying this "from behind the Economist." The awesome outcome he will get from all of this is a wife who is happier with herself and thus with her life with him. You are in for a bumpy ride!
ReplyDeleteSo is he:)
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